FerengiRulesOfAcquisition – Quelltext
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!!Die "Ferengi Rules of Acquisition" inkl. Quellen %%%Die "Ferengi Erwerbsregeln", komplett mit Star-Trek-Episode, dem Character, der sie von sich gibt, dem Buch, in dem sie zitiert werden und den Varianten, die von den Online-Teilnehmern der "Netquisition Contests" erstellt wurden. Enjoy! ---- %%% __1. Once you have their money, you never give it back. __ Sources: 1. Rom, "The Nagus" 2. Nog, Celebrity Comic #1 3. The Klingon Way 4. The Federation Travel Guide 5. Pelgar, "Dear Pelgar", 1999-12-18 __1. If they want their money back, give it to them. __ Source: Rom and Quark, "Prophet Motive" (*) __2. The best deal is the one that brings the most profit. __ Source: Quark, The 34th Rule __3. Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to. __ Sources: 1. Quark, "The Maquis, Part II" 2. The Biology of Star Trek 3. Pelgar, "Dear Pelgar", 2000-01-02 __3. I found it; it's mine. __ Source: Nog, Prisoners of Peace __4. A woman wearing clothes is like a man in the kitchen. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __6. Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity. __ Sources: 1. Zek, "The Nagus" 2. Odo, Saratoga 3. Quark, Rom, and Dax, Wrath of the Prophets 4. Rom, "Lwaxana Troi and the Wedding of Doom" (comic) 5. Quark, Vengeance (*) 6. Rom and Quark, Double Helix #2: Vectors 7. Star Trek on the Brain __7. Keep your ears open. __ Sources: 1. Odo, "In the Hands of the Prophets" 2. Ben Sisko, "The Siege of AR-558" __8. Small print leads to large risk. __ Source: Rules __8. Only a fool passes up a business opportunity. __ Source: Vung, Warchild __9. Opportunity plus instinct equals profit. __ Sources: 1. Nog, "The Storyteller" 2. The Making of ST:DS9 3. Nog, The Pet 4. Nog, Celebrity Comic #1 5. Quark, The Heart of the Warrior 6. Narrator, "Life's Lessons" __10. Greed is eternal. __ Sources: 1. Quark, "Prophet Motive" 2. Arridor and Kol, "False Profits" 3. Quark, Rebels #1: The Conquered __10. Greed is dead. __ Source: Rom, "Prophet Motive" (*) __11. Even if it's free, you can always buy it cheaper. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #3 __12. Anything worth selling is worth selling twice. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __13. Anything worth doing is worth doing for money. __ Sources: 1. The Making of ST:DS9 2. Rules __14. [not given] __ Source: Nog, "Life's Lessons" __15. Keep your family close; keep your latinum closer. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #3 __16. A deal is a deal... until a better one comes along. __ Sources: 1. Quark, "Melora" 2. Nog, Highest Score 3. Rom and Odo, Saratoga __17. A contract is a contract is a contract--but only between Ferengi. __ Source: Rom, Quark, Brunt, and Gint, "Body Parts" __18. A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all. __ Sources: 1. Ben Sisko and Nog, "Heart of Stone" 2. Nog, Celebrity Comic #1 3. Rom and Odo, Saratoga 4. Quark, "Ferengi Love Songs" 5. Quark, Double Helix #2: Vectors __19. Satisfaction is not guaranteed. __ Sources: 1. Quark, "Meridian" 2. Quark, Rebels #2: The Courageous __20. Only give money to people you know you can steal from. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __21. Never place friendship before profit. __ Sources: 1. Quark, "Rules of Acquisition" 2. Star Trek on the Brain 3. Pelgar, "Dear Pelgar", 1999-12-24 __21. Never place profit before friendship. __ Source: Rom, "Prophet Motive" (*) __22. A wise man can hear profit in the wind. __ Sources: 1. Pel, "Rules of Acquisition" 2. Nog, Cardassian Imps 3. Arridor and Kol, "False Profits" 4. Quark, The 34th Rule __22. Latinum tarnishes, but family is forever. __ Source: Rom, "Prophet Motive" (*) __23. Money can never replace dignity. __ Source: Rom, "Prophet Motive" (*) __24. Latinum can't buy happiness, but you can sure have a blast renting it. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __25. There's always a way out. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __26. As the customers go, so goes the wise profiteer. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __27. There's nothing more dangerous than an honest businessman. __ Sources: 1. Rules 2. Quark, Rebels #2: The Courageous __29. What's in it for me? __ Source: Nog, Highest Score __31. Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother. (Insult something he cares about, instead.) __ Source: Quark, "The Siege" (Add-on: Rules) __33. It never hurts to suck up to the boss. __ Sources: 1. Quark and Pel, "Rules of Acquisition" 2. The Making of ST:DS9 3. Odo, Saratoga __34. War is good for business. __ Sources: 1. Quark, "Destiny" 2. Ezri Dax, "The Siege of AR-558" 3. Quark, The 34th Rule (*) 4. Quark, Rebels #3: The Liberated __35. Peace is good for business. __ Sources: 1. Dax, "Destiny" 2. Quark and Rom, Objective: Bajor (*) __37. If it's free, take it and worry about hidden costs later. __ Source: Nog, Arcade __39. Friendship is temporary; profit is forever. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __40. She can touch your lobes, but never your latinum. __ Source: Rules __41. Profit is its own reward. __ Source: Rules __42. What's mine is mine, and what's yours is mine too. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __44. Never confuse wisdom with luck. __ Sources: 1. Rules 2. Ben Sisko, Rebels #1: The Conquered __45. Ambition knows no family. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __46. Make your shop easy to find. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __47. Never trust anyone whose suit is nicer than your own. __ Sources: 1. Quark, "Rivals" 2. Bractor, "The 34th Rule" __48. The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife. __ Sources: 1. Pel, "Rules of Acquisition" 2. Nog, Celebrity Comic #1 3. Odo, Saratoga 4. Star Trek on the Brain (*) 5. Picard, Preserver __49. Everything is worth something to somebody. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __50. Gratitude can bring on generosity. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __51. Reward anyone who adds to your profits so they will continue to do so. __ Source: Bokat, Arcade __52. Never ask when you can take. __ Source: Quark, "Babel" __57. Good customers are as rare as latinum--treasure them. __ Source: Quark, "Armageddon Game" __58. There is no substitute for success. __ Source: Rules __59. Free advice is seldom cheap. __ Sources: 1. Quark, "Rules of Acquisition" 2. The Making of ST:DS9 3. Odo, Saratoga 4. Pelgar, "Dear Pelgar", 2000-01-02 5. Pelgar, "Dear Pelgar", 2000-01-08 __60. Keep your lies consistent. __ Source: Rules (*) __60. Let's you and him fight. __ Sources: 1. Tunk, Balance of Power 2. Rom, "Four Funerals and a Wedding" (comic) __62. The riskier the road, the greater the profit. __ Sources: 1. Pel, "Rules of Acquisition" 2. Nog, Cardassian Imps 3. Quark, "Little Green Men" 4. Gronn, Celebrity Comic #1 (*) 5. Federation (*) 6. Gaila, "Business as Usual" 7. Quark, The 34th Rule 8. Quark, Rebels #2: The Courageous 9. Lept, Preserver __65. Win or lose, there's always Huyperian beetle snuff. __ Source: Rules __65. Huyperian beetle snuff may be fun for you and me, but it's no fun for the beetles. __ Source: Zek, "Prophet Motive" (*) __68. Ear stroking will get you anything. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __69. Ferengi are not responsible for the stupidity of other races. __ Source: Tunk, Balance of Power __72. Never trust your customers. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __73. If it gets you profit, sell your own mother. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __74. Knowledge equals profit. __ Source: Barclay Hologram, "Inside Man" __75. Home is where the heart is, but the stars are made of latinum. __ Sources: 1. Quark, "Civil Defense" 2. Quark, Rebels #1: The Conquered __76. Every once in a while declare peace. __ Sources: 1. Quark, "The Homecoming" 2. Nog, Prisoners of Peace 3. Quark, The 34th Rule __77. It's better to swallow your pride than to lose your profit. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __78. When the going gets tough, the tough change the Rules. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #3 __79. Beware of the Vulcan greed for knowledge. __ Source: Rules __82. The flimsier the product, the higher the price. __ Source: Rules __84. A friend is not a friend if he asks for a discount. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __85. Never let the competition know what you're thinking. __ Source: Rules __87. Learn the customer's weaknesses so you can better take advantage of him. __ Source: Nog, Highest Score __87. A friend in need means three times the profit. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __89. Ask not what your profits can do for you, but what you can do for your profits. __ Source: Rules __92. There are many paths to profit. __ Source: Nog, Highest Score __93. Act without delay! The sharp knife cuts quickly. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __94. Females and finances don't mix. __ Source: 1. Rom, "Ferengi Love Songs" 2. Quark and Nog, "Profit and Lace" 3. The Biology of Star Trek __95. Expand or die. __ Source: Kafar, "False Profits" __96. For every Rule, there is an equal and opposite Rule (except when there's not). __ Source: Rules __97. Enough... is never enough. __ Source: Rules __97. If you can't take it with you, don't go. __ Source: A Nagus, _I, Q_ __98. Every man has his price. __ Sources: 1. Quark, "In the Pale Moonlight" 2. Quark, The 34th Rule __99. Trust is the biggest liability of all. __ Source: Rules __100. If they take your first offer, you either asked too little or offered too much. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __101. The only value of a collectible is what you can get somebody else to pay for it. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __102. Nature decays, but latinum is forever. __ Source: Quark and Nog, "The Jem'Hadar" __103. Sleep can interfere with... [cut off] __ Source: Pel, "Rules of Acquisition" (*) __103. Fill a desperate need with your most expensive product, then mark it up 500%. __ Source: Rom, The Heart of the Warrior __104. Faith moves mountains... of inventory. __ Source: Rules __105. Don't trust anyone who trusts you. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __106. There is no honor in poverty. __ Source: Rules __107. A warranty is valid only if they can find you. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __109. Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack. __ Source: Quark, "Rivals" __111. Treat people in your debt like family--exploit them [ruthlessly]. __ Sources: 1. Ben Sisko, "Past Tense, Part I" 2. Worf, "The Darkness and the Light" 3. Add-on: Quark, Legends of the Ferengi 4. Zuntil, "Dear Pelgar", 2000-05-05 __112. (Omitted) __ Source: Quark, "Playing God" (*) __113. (Omitted) __ Source: Rules (*) __115. The best contract always has a lot of fine print. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #3 __116. There's always a catch. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __119. Never judge a customer by the size of his wallet. (Sometimes, good things come in small packages.) __ Sources: 1. 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 2. "Who Mourns For Morn?" __121. Everything is for sale, even friendship. __ Source: Rules __123. Even a blind man can recognize the glow of latinum. __ Sources: 1. Rules 2. Quark, Rebels #1: The Conquered __125. You can't make a deal if you're dead. __ Source: Quark, "The Siege of AR-558" __126. Count it. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __127. Stay neutral in conflict so that you can sell supplies to both sides. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __135. Never trust a beneficiary. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __139. Wives serve; brothers inherit. __ Sources: 1. Odo, "Necessary Evil" 2. Odo, Saratoga __141. Only fools pay retail. __ Source: Rules __142. There's no such thing as an unfair advantage. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #3 __143. Risk is part of the game--play it for all it's worth. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #3 __144. There's nothing wrong with charity... as long as it winds up in your pocket. __ Sources: 1. Rules 2. Pelgar, "Dear Pelgar", 2000-05-01 __146. Necessity, n. The mother of invention. Profit is the father. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __152. A lie is a way to tell the truth to someone who doesn't know. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __153. Sell the sizzle, not the steak. __ Source: Quark, DS9 Comic #22 __162. Even in the worst of times, someone turns a profit. __ Sources: 1. Rules 2. Rom, Wrath of the Prophets __168. Whisper your way to success. __ Source: Nog, "Treachery, Faith, and the Great River" __169. Competition and fair play are mutually exclusive. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __171. Blood is thicker than water, and latinum is thicker than both. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #3 __172. Chances aren't what they used to be. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #3 __177. Know your enemies... but do business with them always. __ Source: Rules __181. Not even dishonesty can tarnish the shine of profit. __ Source: Rules __184. [not given] __ Source: Tunk, Balance of Power (*) __188. A fool and his money is the best customer. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __189. Let others keep their reputation. You keep their money. __ Source: Rules (*) __190. Hear all; trust nothing. __ Source: Nog, "Call to Arms" __191. A Ferengi waits to bid until his opponents have exhausted themselves. __ Source: Tunk, Balance of Power __192. Never cheat a Klingon... unless you're sure you can get away with it. __ Source: Rules __194. It's always good business to know about new customers before they walk in your door. __ Sources: 1. Quark, "Whispers" (*) 2. Quark, Rebels #1: The Conquered __200. If you're going to have to endure, make yourself comfortable. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __202. The justification of profit is profit. __ Source: Rules __203. New customers are like razor-backed Greeworms--they can be succulent, but sometimes they bite back! __ Source: Quark, "Little Green Men" __204. It takes a Ferengi to cheat a Ferengi. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #3 __208. Sometimes the only thing more dangerous than the question is an answer. __ Source: Zek, "Ferengi Love Songs" __211. Employees are the rungs on the ladder of success--don't hesitate to step on them. __ Sources: 1. Grimp, "Bar Association" 2. Rom, "Lwaxana Troi and the Wedding of Doom" (comic) __214. Never begin a business negotiation on an empty stomach. __ Sources: Quark, "The Maquis, Part I" The Federation Travel Guide __216. Never gamble with an empath. __ Source: Quark, The Laertian Gamble __217. You can't free a fish from water. __ Sources: 1. Quark, "Past Tense, Part I" (*) 2. Lept, Preserver __218. Always know what you're buying. __ Source: Rules (*) __218. Always know the competition. __ Source: Odo, Gypsy World __218. Sometimes what you get free costs entirely too much. __ Source: Quark, DS9 Comic #12: "Baby on Board" __219. Possession is 11/10 of the law. __ Source: Tunk, Balance of Power __223. Beware the man who doesn't make time for oo-mox. __ Sources: 1. Rules 2. "Who Mourns For Morn?" 3. The Biology of Star Trek __229. Latinum lasts longer than lust. __ Sources: 1. Rom, "Ferengi Love Songs" 2. Quark, "Four Funerals and a Wedding" (comic) __231. There's a sucker born every minute; be sure you're the first to find each one. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __236. You can't buy fate. __ Source: Rules __239. Never be afraid to mislabel a product. __ Sources: 1. Gint, "Body Parts" 2. Picard, Preserver __242. More is good... all is better. __ Source: Rules __243. [not given] __ Sources: 1. Quark, "Profit and Loss" 2. Quark, Devil in the Sky __253. Synthehol is the lubricant of choice for a customer's stuck purse. __ Source: Star Trek on the Brain __255. A wife is a luxury... a smart accountant, a necessity. __ Source: Rules __256. Accountants do not play the game; they only keep the score. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #3 __260. Life's not fair. How else would you turn a profit? __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __261. A wealthy man can afford anything except a conscience. __ Source: Rules __262. A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __263. Never allow doubt to tarnish your lust for latinum. __ Source: Rom, "Bar Association" __265. The customer is always right (...until you get their cash). __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #1 __266. When in doubt, lie. __ Source: Rules __267. If you believe it, they believe it. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #3 __270. In business deals, a disruptor can be almost as important as a calculator. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __273. Never trust a hardworking employee. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #2 __277. Anything worth fighting for is worth hiding from. __ Source: 'Rules of Netquisition' #3 __284. Deep down, everyone's a Ferengi. __ Sources: 1. Rules 2. Ben Sisko, Rebels #1: The Conquered __285. No good deed ever goes unpunished. __ Sources: 1. Quark, "The Collaborator" 2. Quark, "The Sound of Her Voice" 3. Quark, Rebels #1: The Conquered 4. Pelgar, "Dear Pelgar", 2000-01-04 __285. A good deed is its own reward. __ Source: Rom, "Prophet Motive" (*) __286. When Morn leaves, it's all over. __ Source: Quark, "The House of Quark" (*) __299. Whenever you exploit someone, it never hurts to thanks them. (That way, it's easier to exploit them the next time.) __ Sources: 1. Neelix, "False Profits" (*) 2. Star Trek on the Brain __?. The more time they take deciding, the more money they will spend. __ Source: Nog, Stowaways __?. The greater (the) amount you are taking from someone, the greater the distraction must be. __ Source: Nog, Stowaways __?. A bargain usually isn't. __ Source: Jake, The Pet __?. One person's secret is another person's opportunity. __ Source: Quark, Devil in the Sky __?. The hand that holds the latinum may also hide a dagger. __ Source: Nog, Highest Score __?. You can tell a great deal about a man from his shoes. __ Source: Merchant, "False Profits" __?. Time's an asset. __ Source: Merchant, "False Profits" __?. Your goods are now my goods. __ Source: Merchant, "False Profits" __?. Exploitation begins at home. __ Source: Arridor and the Sandalmaker, "False Profits" __?. When you see a good deal, jump on it. __ Source: Quark, Saratoga __?. A Ferengi without a head for business has no future. __ Source: Nog, Saratoga __?. Business is business, even among friends. __ Source: Odo, Saratoga __?. Everything has a price. __ Source: Pol, Federation __?. Ears open, eyes wide. __ Source: Quark, The 34th Rule __?. Never believe anyone taller than you. __ Source: Zek, The 34th Rule __?. There's a Rule of Acquisition to cover everything, but that doesn't mean one's always got to be applied. __ Source: Quark, The 34th Rule __?. It's better to live on one's feet than to die on one's knees. __ Source: Quark, Rebels #3: The Liberated __?. A good negotiation should be savored, like a good wine. __ Source: Shep, Double Helix #4: Quarantine __*. When no appropriate Rule applies, make one up. (The unwritten rule) __ Example: When the messenger comes to appropriate your profits, kill the messenger. (Arridor, "False Profits") ---- Regeln erhalten von Gul Dukat.
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